


Cold as a bastard's heart

by fate_of_the_agarwaen



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin
Genre: Belonging, F/M, Gen, Other, Songfic, but only to him, cold-hearted jon snow, jon snow is angsty, jon snow knows what matters, love is not enough, sometimes belonging is more important, sorta - Freeform, well sorta
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-24
Updated: 2015-03-24
Packaged: 2018-03-19 11:35:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 258
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3608580
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fate_of_the_agarwaen/pseuds/fate_of_the_agarwaen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jon loved her, his wilding spearwife, but he could never stay with her. He'd never belong with her people. He'd never belonged with the Starks, either. He only ever belonged on the Wall.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cold as a bastard's heart

_You are the daughter of wolves and the breeze_

Her hair is the wrong colour, Jon thinks, gazing at Ygritte as she lies asleep, her head nuzzled against his chest. It should be white, the white of new-fallen snow, the white of the northern sky, the white of Ghost's pelt. The white of the weirwood trees before which he made his vows to the Night's Watch.

_I am the beast born of winter_

The howling of wolves echoes in Jon's ears, and for a moment he's disoriented – is this a wolf dream, or reality? – before an arrow buries itself in the wood by his ear, and he jerks back behind the barricade, notching another arrow to his bow. As he leans out again, he sees her, flame-kissed hair in tight braids flicking behind her, darting from one dark place to another. He could hit her, the arrow is nocked, the string drawn, the bow ready. All that is left is for him to decide, to loose the shot. There is a war in his heart, between the love that could not give him a place and the vows that let him belong, and for half a heartbeat he falters. But Jon is a Snow, a bastard 'son of winter' who had no true home nor family until he joined the Night's Watch. The arrow flies true. After, when all is quiet and the wildings are dead, he gazes down dry-eyed at her body – twisted and broken, his arrow rising dark and hard from her throat – and turns away.

**Author's Note:**

> Lyrics are from "My Queen of Winter" by Cain's Offering. They were my inspiration.


End file.
